Tag: joy

Posted in Psychology & Medicine

Frisson

Posted on by Jinavie

Have you ever listened to a song or watched a scene in a movie where you suddenly feel a chill run through your body, giving you goosebumps? This is a well-recognised phenomenon called frisson (“shiver” in French). Frisson is colloquially known as “the chills”, thrills, goosebumps, or “skin orgasm”.

Frisson is described as a rapid, intense wave of pleasure, accompanied by tingling and chills spreading through your skin. It is typically triggered by an unexpected, sudden change in the dynamic of a musical piece. This may include a change in loudness, pitch, melody, unexpected harmonies or an appoggiatura in the melody, where there is an accentuated note that does not fit in the chord, creating a clash. If a person is emotionally connected to the piece, such as having a fond memory associated with it, the intensity of frisson is heightened.

Scientifically speaking, frisson is the combination of the reward centre in your brain releasing dopamine, plus the activation of your autonomic nervous system. This results in pupil dilation, piloerection (goosebumps) and increased electrical conductance of your skin, similar to when you have an adrenaline rush.

It is likely the result of your brain being confused by an unexpected change from the predicted progression of the music, causing a strange blend between the pleasure of surprise and fear of the uncertain.

Not everyone experiences frisson. Studies show that around 55-85% of the population have felt frisson before. One study showed that those with the personality trait “openness to experience” have a higher chance of feeling frisson. These people tend to have more intense emotions, active imaginations and are intellectually curious. One possible explanation for why these characteristics allow for frisson is that you need to be in tune with your emotions and the present to appreciate the subtle but sudden dynamic changes that result in frisson.

The potential joy of feeling frisson is yet another benefit of being mindful of your emotions and the present.

(Here’s a video of something that gives me frisson every time I watch it.)

Posted in Life & Happiness

Wonder

Posted on by Jinavie

A common trait seen among children is their sense of wonder. Whether it is a magic trick, an exotic animal or a breathtaking view, children will not hold back in expressing how amazed they are and how excited they are to see it. When they learn or experience something new and amazing, children will be ecstatic that their horizons are now broader. This is because the young, curious mind is always hungry for new information and experiences, and children care little about being judged for being passionate about something.

As we grow older, we lose our sense of wonder. We become weary from the stress of life and our hearts become dulled to experiencing joy and excitement. Instead of relying on our ability to feel amazement as a source of happiness, we rely on external factors such as the attention of other people, chemicals such as alcohol or cigarettes, or passive entertainment such as watching television. As we use it less and less, our sense of wonder wilts away.

This is unfortunate because this sense of wonder is exactly what we need to counteract the stress and misery that adult life brings. Even though we have grown up to become cynical and – sadly – boring, there is still so much in the world to be amazed by.

Travelling exposes us to new horizons to pursue, new perspectives to see from and new experiences to have. The people around us have countless stories to tell us of their own experiences, if we stop to listen. Even during your ordinary day, you can stop and look up to enjoy the clear blue sky, the colourful sunset and the star-strewn night sky. We are surrounded by amazing things, but we fail to notice them.

The lesson we can learn from children is that it is okay to feel positive emotions and to express them. Because of tradition and societal pressures, we learn to hide or even deny our own emotions because it is seen as a sign of weakness. But we are still creatures ruled by waves of internal emotions, and if we don’t learn how to ride the waves, then the waves will overwhelm us.

Next time you feel miserable, take a minute and look around you: what might a child be amazed by in your surroundings, or in your current life? Consider that the old building you pass on your commute has a rich history spanning centuries. Consider that your “boring” elderly neighbour would have led a life full of excitement, sadness and joy, just like you. Consider the vastness of the universe and how little we know about it, and how insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things.

Be curious. Be amazed. Be excited. You will find it adds so much colour to your life.

Posted in Life & Happiness

The Joy Of Connection

Posted on by Jinavie

What is the commonality of the following? New parents holding their newborn baby, a young couple in love staring into each other’s eyes, catching up with an old friend and a hug. The obvious answer is that they are moments of happiness. But the real answer that lies beyond that is that they are all about connection. Human beings are social creatures and we are hardwired to like connecting with others. In the primitive days, not being connected to your tribemates meant a lower chance of survival. Over the years, we have evolved to the point where human connection is one of the greatest joys we can experience. Many things people may associate with “joy” such as money, sex and winning result in a flood of dopamine in the brain. Dopamine is great, it gives us a rush and acts as a reward system, motivating us to do more of the behaviour as it will likely result in more food or mates. However, dopamine quickly wears off and you need another “hit” to replicate the effects. The happiness produced by connection is based on a different neurotransmitter called oxytocin, which is produced en masse in events like physical contact (e.g. hug) and during childbirth. Oxytocin acts different to dopamine in that it sets up a “circuit” that is associated with a memory. If you recall a memory – either consciously or when you meet a stimulus such as a certain smell that reminds you of it – the oxytocin circuit fires up and gives you a dose of happiness. Thus, oxytocin is sustainable, true happiness.

Of course, the corollary to this is that the greatest suffering we can experience is the feeling of disconnection. Breaking up with your other half, being rejected, a dear friend moving far away, the death of a loved one… These events make us feel as if a piece of heartstring snapped, leaving a scar that aches for a long while. In prison, one of the harshest punishments is solitary confinement, where the inmate has no contact with any other human being for a set time. A characteristic of borderline personality disorder is emotional instability and impulsive decisions. A major trigger for this is the feeling of abandonment or the fear of rejection. Borderline patients tend to misinterpret a person through black-and-white thinking, conclude they must hate them, feel rejected and may go on to harm themselves or even attempt suicide. There is also some anecdotal evidence saying that babies who are brought up in institutions without a parent figure to truly connect to are more likely to develop personality and mental disorders, with an increased risk of death in infancy. To not be connected to anyone is true suffering.

So if you are still on the pursuit of happiness, go out there and connect. Whether it be the excitement of getting to know a new person or the rekindling of an old friendship, connection is the ultimate happiness.

(Image source: Puuung http://www.grafolio.com/puuung1)

Posted in Life & Happiness

Simple Pleasures

Posted on by Jinavie

Consider this theory. People feel happy when they experience an upturn in life. A hungry person is happy when he receives food, a poor person is happy when she earns money, and a person seeking love is happy when they find love. But as people are highly adaptable creatures, they become used to such upturns very quickly. Even the happiness brought on by great food and luxurious lifestyles tend to fade over time, and the love between a couple who act like they cannot live without each other will eventually die away. To remedy this, people always seek excitement that will create an upturn in life, giving them happiness. This causes them to adventure, seek new experiences and sometimes make dangerous, risky decisions.

Everyone has a point in their lives that could be called the “peak”. But no matter how tall the peak is, as people will adapt to it soon, the height itself does not matter. What matters is the path to the peak. For example, if someone experiences their peak in life too early, every moment from then on will seem worse than the past. The person will continuously face disappointment and reminiscence the good times. The reason being, no upturn can beat the peak that they experienced, meaning they cannot feel the happiness of an upturn in life. According to this theory, the key to a happy life is delaying this peak as much as possible. When life is starting to get boring and dull, add just a little sprinkle of greatness in your life to continuously infuse it with happiness.

However, life is not as predictable and controllable as we want it to be, making this theory highly implausible. But the theory is not completely wrong. Although it is near impossible to artificially add little upturns throughout life, it is extremely easy to “feel” an upturn. All you need to do is change your perspective. The difference between a happy person and a miserable person is that the former finds joy in the smallest things. A miserable person will feel bored unless something exciting is happening, but a happy person leads what appears to be a boring life while enjoying every minute of it. Enjoying a warm cup of coffee on a rainy day, being astounded by the beautiful sky, smelling the roses on the path, singing and dancing when no one is looking… Finding and enjoying the simple pleasures of life is the most important skill one can have in life.

Who would you rather be: a miserable person who always seeks excitement and thrills or a happy person who enjoys a “boring” life?

Posted in History & Literature

Three Graces

Posted on by Jinavie

Among the many gods and goddesses in Greek mythology, there is a trio of goddesses who are personifications of beauty, elegance and grace – Aglaia (brightness and splendour), Thalia (festivity and plentiful) and Euphrosyne (joyfulness). They are daughters of Zeus and Eurynome the nymph and are famous for their pure, graceful looks and representing the beauty in life. Also known as the Charities, they are often depicted in artworks as dancing merrily in a circle or tending to Aphrodite, the goddess of love and sex, and her son Eros. 

The Graces are known as young, virgin maidens who are often depicted as naked with clear, fair skin. They are beauty in the purest form with the absence of sexual lust (despite the nudity). Although they have no active role in mythologies, it is considered that their presence in any party or festival ensures people will have a joyous and fun time. Much like the Muses, the Three Graces are also connected to the arts, often shown with musical instruments. They are one of the most popular models in paintings and sculptures as they embody the concept of perfect beauty. This is why, like Aphrodite, they tend to be drawn with body proportions matching the Golden Ratio.
Interestingly, they are almost always arranged to have two facing forwards with the middle one facing the other way. 

(From top-left: Sandro Botticelli’s Primavera, Antonio Canova’s The Three Graces, Raphael’s The Three Graces, Greek sculpture of The Three Graces, Raphael’s Cupid and The Three Graces)