Posted in Life & Happiness

Theme Of The Year

Even though nothing special actually happens on January 1st, we like to think that it is the perfect time to start anew and become a better you. We set goals and resolutions for the New Year in the hopes of making a positive life change, but we quickly find that it is insanely hard to change our behaviours.

Our brains love defaulting to the lazy option and will justify bad behaviours, so we fall into the cycle of mediocrity and bad habits. This is why in January, we see the gym full of people of steely resolve aiming to lose weight, but by February, the gym has cleared out and only the regular exercisers remain.

We can combat this tendency (and cliché) for New Year’s resolutions failing with SMART goals (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, time-based), such as “I want to lose 5kg of weight within one year”. Having a clear, realistic goal that can be reviewed along the way is much more effective than a vague resolution that can easily be forgotten or warped by our feeble minds.

But even SMART goals have flaws. Not meeting goals can be crushing to our self-esteem, which seems contrary to our resolution to become healthier. The pressure of goals can take away from enjoying simple pleasures of life and we can easily obsess over meaningless metrics such as daily step counts.

If you feel that goals are too daunting or easy to fail, an alternative is to set a broad theme for the year. For example, the New Year could be a Year of Reading, Year of Less, Year of Health or Year of Balance. Instead of specific goals or unrealistic resolutions, themes allow you to set a broad undertone for the year, guiding your everyday decisions and actions.

(Image source: Puuung http://www.grafolio.com/puuung1)

For example, a Year of Novelty may push you to go on an adventure to a country you have never been to, instead of a safe holiday to a place you go to every year. A Year of Learning might make you choose to read about a new skill or hobby instead of watching another episode of reality TV. Themes act as algorithms or bots assisting your decision-making. Essentially, every time it is applicable, think about how a choice or decision (no matter how small) fits into your yearly theme and act accordingly.

When you look back at the end of the year, you will notice that there were ups and downs, such as your weight fluctuating, but as long as you keep to your theme, the general trend will hopefully have been positive and you would have enacted change. Changes in human behaviour happen on slow scales, so seeing the big picture is very important to keep up your motivation.

Themes should be broad, letting you adapt to change and unexpected obstacles. For example, an illness or accident may make a goal of saving $5000 for the year unrealistic. But a Year of Finance will accommodate for this, because you will instead be setting up healthy habits such as eliminating unnecessary costs such as subscriptions, keeping account books and tackling high-interest debts. Even slowing down the accumulation of debt will be a positive life change in this situation. Over the course of your life, you will be much better off because you changed your behaviour and created a healthy system.

It does not matter what word you choose as your theme, as long as it is applicable to and resonates with you, so that you stay interested in it. The act of applying the theme itself will become a habit, training your mind to be more focussed and act with direction. If a year seems too long, you can always change the time period to a month, a quarter or a season – such as Autumn of Gratitude.

At the end of the day, setting a theme for the year is a simple tool that is very easy to apply, while having the potential to be far more effective and powerful compared to a flimsy resolution. It takes little effort to set a broad theme and the direction you want to head in, especially if it resonates with your inner desire for positive change.

The only way to grow and improve yourself is to think about how to improve yourself and take action. Having a simple system such as a theme is the easiest start to getting in the habit of actively improving your life.

So why not give it a try?

I learnt the concept of having a yearly theme from CGP Grey, an amazing Youtube content creator! Check out this video for a nice, succinct summary and helpful tips 🙂
Posted in Life & Happiness

Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Everyone goes through a tough time at least once in their lives. As modern life is ideal for stress to build, it is easy to get weighed down by fatigue and negativity. Pent-up stress is the cause of all ill health and one cannot lead a healthy life without overcoming their stress.
Although everyone has a unique method of overcoming stress, there are some very effective generic methods of stress relief. Some examples include hobbies, laughter yoga and meditation, but the method that will be introduced here is progressive muscle relaxation, or PMR.
PMR is very simple and doesn’t take up much time, making it a useful way of relieving stress for busy people.

  1. Sit back comfortably, close your eyes and rid yourself of all thoughts.
  2. Breathe in slowly and deeply and then breathe out. Concentrate on your breathing.
  3. Relax all the muscles in your body into a jelly-like state.
  4. Squeeze both hands into a fist as hard as possible for 5 seconds, then release.
  5. Rest 5 seconds and then repeat twice more.
  6. After three cycles of contraction and relaxation, repeat with your arm muscles.
  7. Apply the same three cycles on your feet, legs, abdomen, chest, neck and head.

The key principle of PMR is achieving complete relaxation by concentrating all your energy into one spot then releasing it. Furthermore, concentrating on your slow breathing has a meditation effect, resting both your mind and body. Once you are relaxed from head to toe, you will feel all the fatigue in your body disappear.
There is no greater enemy than stress. Therefore, it is best to have your own defence mechanism against it, but it also very useful to know a few general methods.

Now, try the progressive muscle relaxation on yourself to resolve all the stress that accumulated over the day.

Posted in Life & Happiness

New Year’s Resolution

On the last day of the year, almost anyone is bound to make a few New Year’s resolutions. However, realistically it is rare for those resolutions to be kept, and instead forgotten within weeks. But according to Dr Richard Wiseman’s experiment, it was found that utilising other techniques instead of just keeping them to oneself was more effective in carrying out those resolutions. Here are ten methods to help keep one’s New Year’s resolution successful:

  1. Make one resolution only: Rather than making many false promises, it is better to concentrate your efforts into one.
  2. Tell someone to remind you: A resolution only in one’s mind is bound to be forgotten. Instead, tell a friend or a loved one to remind you, or write up a big sign or post a picture somewhere visible.
  3. Plan ahead: Making resolutions requires planning; instead of making an impromptu resolution on the night, think for a few days beforehand for a more effective plan.
  4. Be specific: Vague plans always fail. Instead of “I will quit smoking”, try something specific like “I will smoke one cigarette less for every two days”.
  5. Do not reuse old resolutions: Reusing resolutions will only bring regret and frustration from constant failure, so either make a fresh resolution or use a different approach, such as changing “I will get better grades” to “I will study more”.
  6. Set S.M.A.R.T goals: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Time-based goals are significantly more effective and efficient. For example, if you are looking for a new job, rewrite your CV, set goals you can keep for every new week and apply for a job twice every week.
  7. Think positively: Rather than thinking of the repercussions of not making a resolution, think of the rewards of keeping the resolution.
  8. Carrot over stick: Think how your life will improve from the resolution. For instance, deciding to socialise more will bring more friends, more fun and more happiness into your life.
  9. Visualise: Seeing yourself carrying out the resolution and reaping the reward will help keep the resolution.
  10. Be Persistent: Forming habits take time, so do not blame yourself or give up when you slip up a few times. Instead, you must keep trying with perseverance and confidence.

Lastly, the research also found that women are worse at keeping resolutions compared to men (30% vs 37% respectively).