Posted in Life & Happiness

Express Yourself

Emotion is a funny thing, in that we all feel emotions, but we each express them in different ways. Some people are great at verbalising how they are feeling about something, while others will be reluctant to share their emotional state with others. There are many factors involved, such as the individual’s upbringing, cultural background, personality type and past experiences.

In general, society seems to encourage people to hide their emotions. People who cry in front of others are seen as weak and fragile. People who smile and laugh a lot are seen as untrustworthy or foolish. Because of these stigmas, people learn to hide their emotions more and more as they grow up. We try our best to appear rational, calm and professional in the eyes of others.

But emotion is not a tame horse that can be controlled so easily. It is like a wild elephant that will behave irrationally and impulsively, and as the rider, we can only try to steer it on the right path. Because the elephant is so much more powerful than the rider, it is foolish to resist against it and try to force it to go a certain way.

This means that when people try to stop their emotions, it finds another way to be expressed. When you suppress your anger and worries, it manifests as cranky behaviour, causing you to lash out at the blameless people around you. When you try to hold back your tears, it will build up and up until it causes subconscious trauma. Worst of all, if you continue to suppress your emotions, your emotional intelligence will dim, and your ability to recognise and interpret your emotions will atrophy away. This will make you even more vulnerable to extreme swings in emotions, giving you even less control.

The solution to all of this is simple – express yourself. It is okay to cry. It is okay to laugh. It is okay to feel. Watch a sappy movie or a hilarious show to explore the breadth of your emotional range. Practise laughing out loud often. Make it a habit to be mindful of how you are feeling currently, and be comfortable in expressing that to another human being.

Emotions are a natural part of our identity and others have no right to strip that away from you to make you a lesser person. Of course, you need to be able to read the room and be able to compose yourself if the situation calls for it, but for the most part, little harm can come from you being able to show others how you are feeling.

More importantly, it is difficult for your loved ones to truly understand who you are if you do not communicate your emotions to them. If you didn’t share that you were stressed at work today, they may think your sullen mood and solemnity were due to their wrongdoing. Emotion drives us in so many different ways, so it is impossible for your partner to understand the intent behind your actions and words if they don’t know how you are feeling. Communication helps clear up the misunderstandings, letting you build a deeper connection.

Embrace the emotional elephant within you and learn to become friends with it. It will make the journey of life much smoother and less rocky.

(Image source: Puuung http://www.grafolio.com/puuung1)

Posted in Life & Happiness

Good

Good food.

Good wine.

Good coffee.

Good dessert.

Good song.

Good show.

Good laugh.

Good company.

The simpler your demands, the easier life can fulfil them and give you happiness.

image

Posted in Psychology & Medicine

Laughter Epidemic

It is said that laughter is infectious. In 1962, an extreme case of “laughter infection” happened in village in Tanzania. The phenomenon originated in a boarding school for girls. On January 30, three girls spontaneously burst out in laughter and could not stop themselves from laughing. Soon after, the whole class was suffering from fits of uncontrollable laughter. The “infection” then spread throughout the school, claiming 95 of the 159 students over a stretch of two months. This strange symptom of uncontrollable laughter lasted anywhere from a few hours to 16 days. Interestingly, teachers were not affected and only girls between the ages of 12 to 18 were affected. By March 18, the school was forced to close down due to students not being able to focus during class.

The laughter epidemic was not localised to the school. After the school shut down and the girls returned home, fellow villagers were afflicted by the laughing disease, resulting in 217 villagers being “infected” by May (mostly children and teenagers). By June, the laughing epidemic spread to another nearby school, affecting 48 girls. The epidemic then went on to claim two more schools, forcing them to close down. By the time the epidemic died down (6 to 18 months after “patient zero”), it had affected over a 1000 people and shut down 14 schools.

So what was this strange disease? Was it some new viral infection causing neurological symptoms? Was it a toxin in the water supply? The answer was even simpler: mass psychogenic illness, also known as mass hysteria. Mass hysteria is a psychological phenomenon that occurs in groups placed in high-tension situations, such as within an airplane. This setting is perfect for triggering a mass delusion, causing the person to believe they are suffering from a physical disease. The trigger is usually another “patient” and the hysteria spreads like wildfire, usually by people seeing affected victims. Although the above case makes mass hysteria look like a harmless, amusing phenomenon, psychosomatism (when the mind tricks the body into thinking it is sick) can cause symptoms such rashes, fevers, vomiting and even paralysis. In fact, all of these symptoms were also reported during the Tanganyika laughter epidemic.

Posted in Psychology & Medicine

Laughter

We laugh when we are happy. Laughter provides us with happiness and is the best medicine available to us, relieving the pain and stress of life. In fact, when we laugh we secrete a neurotransmitter called endorphin, which as the name suggests (endo(inside) + morphine), has the same properties as morphine.

What makes us laugh? The best theory to date is that laughter is an instinctive response to the passing of danger (also called the relief theory). For example, if our ancestor came across a predator but it passed by without noticing him, he would have laughed in response to the relief he felt. Others would see from his laugh that the danger had passed and laugh also (possibly explaining why laughter is contagious).

This theory also explains why humour makes us laugh. When you throw a joke, you are essentially giving the other person a “cognitive riddle” with a logical inconsistency. This inconsistency causes the recipient’s subconscious to become confused: “Why is it funny? Why can’t I understand it?”. As jokes are fundamentally a “surprise” to the other person’s mind, they try to solve it and figure it out whether it is a danger or not. If they get the joke, the inconsistency is solved and the person feels relief (as it has been revealed that the confusion brought on by the inconsistency was not dangerous). Once the confusion passes, the person laughs in response. But if the person does not get the joke, the “danger” has not passed and the person does not laugh. This is the basis of one of the laws of comedians: “if the audience is confused, they do not laugh”.

Laughter is beneficial for your health. Frequent laughter lowers the blood pressure, boosts the immune system, relieves pain and lowers the levels of stress hormones such as cortisol. Laughter is especially good for your mental health, therefore having a five-minute laughter yoga session every day where you just laugh as hard as you can will help you lead a happier life. However, ironically laughter can kill you too. Cases of “death from laughter” have been recorded since ancient Greek times to the modern day. The cause has not been identified but it is known that intense laughter can cause cataplexy, which is a paralysis induced by extreme emotions. It is possible that intense laughter overloads the nervous system and causes a heart attack.

Whatever it is, anything is toxic in excess.

Posted in History & Literature

Satire

독소(獨笑) (To Laugh Alone)

有粟無人食 (유속무인식) 
A household with great wealth lacks children, 

多男必患飢 (다남필환기) 
A household with many children is poor, 

達官必準愚 (달관필준우) 
Those who are at high positions are idiots, 

才者無所施 (재자무소시) 
Those with talent have no way to develop them.

家室少完福 (가실소완복) 
A house with complete luck is rare to find, 

至道常陵遲 (지도상릉지) 
Great morality is bound to fade away, 

翁嗇子每蕩 (옹색자매탕) 
If the father is thrift then the son is prodigal, 

婦慧郞必癡 (부혜랑필치) 
If the wife is wise then the husband is foolish.

月滿頻値雲 (월만빈치운) 
When the full moon is out the weather is cloudy, 

花開風誤之 (화개풍오지) 
When the flowers are at full bloom the weather is windy. 

物物盡如此 (물물진여차) 
Such is how everything works. 

獨笑無人知 (독소무인지) 
There is no one who knows the reason why I am laughing.

~ Dasan Jeung Yak Yong (a Korean academic from the late 18th century)

Posted in Life & Happiness

For Them

Eat, for those who are starving.
Run, for those who cannot walk.
Breathe, for those who are suffocating.
Dream, for those who have lost hope.

See, for those who are blind.
Listen, for those who are deaf.
Feel, for those who are numb.
Speak, for those who are voiceless.

Laugh, for those who are crying.
Love, for those who are heartbroken.
Live, for those who are dying.
Be happy, for those who are miserable.

There is no excuse for not doing what you can. 
There is no excuse for trapping yourself in a box.
If it does not harm you or others, then do whatever the hell makes you happy.