Tag: cry

Posted in Life & Happiness

Express Yourself

Posted on by Jinavie

Emotion is a funny thing, in that we all feel emotions, but we each express them in different ways. Some people are great at verbalising how they are feeling about something, while others will be reluctant to share their emotional state with others. There are many factors involved, such as the individual’s upbringing, cultural background, personality type and past experiences.

In general, society seems to encourage people to hide their emotions. People who cry in front of others are seen as weak and fragile. People who smile and laugh a lot are seen as untrustworthy or foolish. Because of these stigmas, people learn to hide their emotions more and more as they grow up. We try our best to appear rational, calm and professional in the eyes of others.

But emotion is not a tame horse that can be controlled so easily. It is like a wild elephant that will behave irrationally and impulsively, and as the rider, we can only try to steer it on the right path. Because the elephant is so much more powerful than the rider, it is foolish to resist against it and try to force it to go a certain way.

This means that when people try to stop their emotions, it finds another way to be expressed. When you suppress your anger and worries, it manifests as cranky behaviour, causing you to lash out at the blameless people around you. When you try to hold back your tears, it will build up and up until it causes subconscious trauma. Worst of all, if you continue to suppress your emotions, your emotional intelligence will dim, and your ability to recognise and interpret your emotions will atrophy away. This will make you even more vulnerable to extreme swings in emotions, giving you even less control.

The solution to all of this is simple – express yourself. It is okay to cry. It is okay to laugh. It is okay to feel. Watch a sappy movie or a hilarious show to explore the breadth of your emotional range. Practise laughing out loud often. Make it a habit to be mindful of how you are feeling currently, and be comfortable in expressing that to another human being.

Emotions are a natural part of our identity and others have no right to strip that away from you to make you a lesser person. Of course, you need to be able to read the room and be able to compose yourself if the situation calls for it, but for the most part, little harm can come from you being able to show others how you are feeling.

More importantly, it is difficult for your loved ones to truly understand who you are if you do not communicate your emotions to them. If you didn’t share that you were stressed at work today, they may think your sullen mood and solemnity were due to their wrongdoing. Emotion drives us in so many different ways, so it is impossible for your partner to understand the intent behind your actions and words if they don’t know how you are feeling. Communication helps clear up the misunderstandings, letting you build a deeper connection.

Embrace the emotional elephant within you and learn to become friends with it. It will make the journey of life much smoother and less rocky.

(Image source: Puuung http://www.grafolio.com/puuung1)

Posted in Science & Nature

Caesarean Section

Posted on by Jinavie

(To read about how babies are made and born, read the From Cell to Birth miniseries! https://jineralknowledge.com/tag/arkrepro/?order=asc)

Most animals give birth through a female’s vagina. Of course humans are the same when it comes to natural birth, but nowadays, it is not uncommon to find women wanting a caesarean instead of the traditional method. A caesarean (also called C-section) is a surgical procedure where the fetus is taken out by cutting through the lower abdomen into the uterus. The history of caesareans is quite dark. Back in the old days when medicine was not advanced, caesareans were mostly used to rescue fetuses from mothers who had died during childbirth. The first record of a successful caesarean where the mother survived dates back to the 1500s. Many people believe the word “caesarean” came from the Roman emperor Julius Caesar, who was allegedly born via a caesarean. However, it was rare for caesareans to be performed in Roman times and even if they were, the mothers almost certainly died in the process. Given that his mother was alive and healthy well into his adulthood, it is highly unlikely that Caesar was born by caesarean (there are no concrete records of it either).

There is much debate to whether a caesarean is better or worse than natural birth (except in emergency situations where a caesarean is required). According to research (in cases without known risks to the fetus), the mortality rate is definitely higher in babies born by caesarean compared to those born naturally. This is most likely due to a caesarean bypassing some of the physiological changes that occur during vaginal birth.

Another debate is about the use of general versus regional anaesthesia (spinal block) when doing a caesarean. A fascinating fact about childbirth is that when a baby is born, it cries to expand its lungs but then quietens down for about an hour (unless it is in pain or there is some stimuli). This is possibly a mechanism to allow bonding between the mother and baby. New mothers often remember the moments following the birth of the child as extremely emotional and blissful. Contrastingly, mothers who are under general anaesthesia and not awake when their child is born bond less with the baby initially (some mothers do not even recognise the baby as their own). Thus, unless it is an emergency caesarean, a spinal block (which allows the mother to be awake and painless) is preferable over general anaesthesia.

Lastly, it is common tradition to cut the umbilical cord straight after the child is born. But is this okay? When the fetus is in the uterus, it shares its cardiovascular system with the placenta. The umbilical cord connects the two and carries blood to and fro. At any given point, the placenta contains 30~50% of the fetal blood. If the umbilical cord is suddenly cut, the fetus essentially loses this blood, being born in a state of low blood volume. If you look at the umbilical cord, you can see that it is about 1m in length, which is enough for the baby to be put next to the mother’s breasts for breastfeeding and bonding. Perhaps we are cutting the cord too soon, not letting the blood flow back from the placenta to the fetus.

If you think about it, humanity has been giving birth without too many problems to survive generation after generation for 200,000 years (otherwise we would not exist). Although the mortality rate was high, Mother Nature has optimised childbirth over time through evolution. Ergo, it is possible that modern medicine is intervening too much in a natural process. We must always consider whether medical advances are helpful or harmful to us.

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Posted in Psychology & Medicine

How To Calm A Baby

Posted on by Jinavie

One of the hardest things about being a new parent is how to quell the cries of a newborn. Since crying is their only way of communicating needs, babies cry constantly and this can be extremely distressing for the parents. 
Of course the best way is to deal with what the baby needs, such as food or changing their diaper, but the cause is not always clear. Most parents use the traditional method of picking the baby up and slowly patting or rubbing the baby’s back. By patting at a similar beat to the mother’s heartbeat, the baby feels at ease as it reminds it of the relaxing state within the womb.

There are some other less conventional methods that have been shown to work. For example, turning the vacuum cleaner on or any other white noise (such as the washing machine, rustling a plastic bag or even gargling water in your mouth) has an instant effect of stopping the baby’s cries (NB: usually only works on infants below 3 months of age). The reason being, these noises are at a similar frequency to the noises the baby hears in the womb, such as the mother’s guts moving, blood flowing through the vessels and sounds from the outsides being transmitted through the mother. As the brain remembers such relaxing states for the fist few months, these stimuli induce a relaxing response and calm the baby.
Similarly, turning on rock & roll music (not too loudly) calms the baby in the first few months as they are unable to recognise the words but can still feel the vibration from the rhythm, which again reminds the baby of the womb.

The same principle can be used to simulate other features of womb life. Rocking the baby slowly simulates the sensation when the mother is walking, wrapping the baby in a blanket simulates the warmth and cosy nature of the womb and giving the baby something to suck on like a pacifier induces the powerful sucking reflex which calms the baby.
As a last resort, touching the inside of the ear canal with your little finger causes the baby to become confused about the strange sensation, distracting the baby. Although this method is effective up to 24 months, it is not recommended as it can lead to an ear infection.

On a similar note, when a baby or young child is stubbornly holding on to something, the best method to get it back is for the mother to pretend that they are crying. The child, empathising with the mother and not wanting her to be sad, yields the object in their hand to make her happy. But this method may not work after a while when the child realises you are tricking them.